sick of the city

2007-07-16 (2)

written on Friday - july 13:

 

i think what i really really need is a break. okay, it's not like i've been working too hard or have been too busy with something. but still, i need a change of scenery. i want to just shop a little, pack my bags and go somewhere and takelots of photographs. the place has to be cold, quiet and calm. i don't want the sound of traffic, pollution, news of murders rapes and all that crap. for company i want my family..my dog.. i want 2-3 friends and i want him. i need a break!! i need to get away!! and its not happening anytime soon. too many things for everyone to do.

argh !~@# kind of frustrated.

later

berserrrk

what's up!?

2007-07-16 (2)


aaaaaaa.... my throat's fucked. we had a long karaoke party!! it was awesome.. it was so much fun.. i sang faith - george michael , sacrifice - elton john (which rocked), heal the world - mj ... i'm too sexy-right said fred (sucked!) , damm maro dammmm...and some others... I think my sacrifice was the best!!! i wish creep was there in the list...

anyway... it was a good change from the daily night routine of dinner..tv..discussions..sleep. i missed him a lot while singing...i wish he was there. even though i am a pathetic singer... i would have loved to look in his eyes and sing for him....

a friend of mine had a problem with me not being able to make it tomorrow to go out with him..i tried explaining him the situation using X,Y and Z.. but i don't think he really got it. but then its alright. he asked me to solve the problem. what do i do? there's no problem to solve. i dont see a problem in me refusing to go out alone with a guy while being in a very committed relationship with another guy who i love very very much and who would hate it if i spent time alone with another guy. I think i understand it completely cuz i couldnt stand him meeting a female friend of his ALONE. no way... there will be a huge fight and lots of tears .. lots of bad feeling... lots of shit. i'd just catch the next flight to his town and tell him in person that he better not do it again or he's gonna lose me. i think i'm worse when it comes to being possessive. my sweetheart thinks he is over possessive... he doesn't have any idea about me yet cuz' he hasn't given me a chance yet to show the real me... over-over possessive. but yeah i do believe in giving him his space..i dont like to disturb him while he's at work and while he's out with his buddies. but i do like to make sure sometimes that there are all boys he he he. cant help being inquisitive... need to be. i trust my guy more than i trust myself but still.... i cant sometimes stop myself from asking him A LOT OF questions

ok backache.

later

berserrrk
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